Nature, pure bliss


What a packed and busy week. With everything cramping up all at one shot, the negative side of me seemed to triple itself, evolving into a massive bomb, which exploded right smack in between the valves in my heart, causing internal bleeding with a pain nothing could numb, causing rapid flow of tears boxes of tissues wasn't even enough. I am not a weakling, I just couldn't take it. I finally broke down that night. No I wasn't emo-ing, I was merely just letting my emotions out, I hate bottling up my feelings.

Oh did I JUST mentioned that I hate bottling up my feelings? Don't believe me. Because as much as I hate that, I ALWAYS DID. What an irony, indeed. Especially when I don't want to spoil the relationship between me and my group members. Firstly, you need to know not everyone is like you, not everyone can stay up late just to do their work. I mean I can, but I cannot assure the quality of my work. I set the deadline way beforehand, told you guys to submit the work I delegated to you, and what no one keep to it. I set 10pm, you all send me at 3am. HELLO? YOU LATE, THEN I NEED TO SLEEP LATE LA? Honestly, I DO NOT MIND AT ALL, and I mean not at all. BUT I remember emphasizing that, I need to sleep early because I have an important match the next day, and I need full strength and focus to play well. Selfish people would pretend and feign ignorance, heck care because you don't understand. Think I was joking when I said I need to sleep early.

And it's not even like, I told you this morning that you need to submit to me by 10pm. I did it way beforehand, okay? My part was also done so much more efficient than you all. Truthfully, next time just put yourself into my shoes, it is really not easy to handle both competition and project. I did not complain, because I know I was the one who chose to take this path. I did it with no regrets and no plans to look back. I broke down because I felt like I did my part, but I had to take the shield of what's not done by these irresponsible people.

The most contradicting and saddening part is that, I do like you all as friends. But when it comes to serious work, you guys give me a feeling that I want to go as far away as possible from you all. I cannot show my true feelings, because I treat you all as my friends too. Ironic, again.


I've just registered splash down with Nat! Basically this race is an annual event conducted by NUS. Swim 100 laps within 3hours to get the finisher tee, I trust myself that I can do it. LOL. When you complete 1 lap, someone will pass you a rubber band, and these rubber bands you can exchange for presents? haha not so much of that, I just want to see smart guys from NUS. HAHA ummmmm kinda retarded. I am excited! because this is my first swimming event!

Today, I went to rollerblade with beloved :) Knowing that I am down, he decided to bring me to the beach :) thank bbbbb :)